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Wednesday, September 12, 2007

Camo- Karma- Camo- Karma- Camo- Karma-elian

So ... remember a few months ago, I wrote a blog that BASHED camouflage clothing worn by non-military civilians TO BITS?

Well, as karma always gets its way, I feel like I need to update all readers of my current situation.

In the past few months, I've had some drastic changes in my life - got married, went to Cancun for a couple weeks, moved my wife & two new step-daughters two thousand miles across the country in the middle of the AZ summer, closed down the smoothie shop, worked at a CPA firm doing taxes for a couple of months, decided to get back to the corporate world and lengthy commute I had sworn off less than a year before, began crossing my legs in a more "european" way, and the biggest change of all ... had camo introduced into my life.

Let me explain - my 6-yr old step-daughter just began first grade a month ago. She has the most amazing sense of intuition I have EVER beheld. And she is curious to the Nth degree to add to that. Which makes for a potentially very dangerous situation at home. Anytime my wife and I might be up to something ... well, something that newly-weds are wont to be up to ... "WHAT ARE YOU GUYS DOING IN THERE?! HEY, WHY IS YOUR DOOR LOCKED?! OH WELL, I KNOW HOW TO UNLOCK IT..." Yeah, this kind of stuff happens all the time. I know what you're thinking, just wait til she goes to bed... well her spider sense is so profound that she will wake up if she feels there may be something going on. (And there's NO possible way she can hear us over the fan in her room...) Anyway.

So I had never said a word to her (the anonymous 6-yr old) about my feelings toward camo. But somehow she must have just sensed it. About a month ago, while the girls were out back-to-school shopping, I get a text from my wife who knows and shares my feelings toward camo, "[anonymous 6-yr old] just insisted that her new shoes are camo. She wouldn't choose anything else. I couldn't stop her. I tried everything I could. Sorry." Nothing I could text to my wife at that instant could express how deeply saddened I was.



And nothing I could text my wife at that instant would make the young camo-ist change her mind. In the week following the camo shoes coming into our home, three other pink camo articles of clothing made their way into our home, a mere 40 feet from where I sleep. And a mere 45 feet from where I eat my PB/Nutella slightly toasted sandwiches every morning (another blog for another day).

SHE SOMEHOW COULD SENSE MY ABSOLUTELY UTTER ABHORENCE TOWARD CAMO. And she just HAD to rebel against that distaste.

Apparently, camo is all the rage right now. But guess what? I COULDN'T CARE LESS.

AND NEITHER COULD KARMA.

But that's how karma works, right?

7 comments:

David said...

I'm glad my mom doesn't read this blog. In fact, I'm glad my mom doesn't know what a blog is.

I hope [anonymous 6 year old girl] got the shoes, if not out of spite then because they probably look really cute.

Marc said...

The injustice!!! What's next?! Kobe speaking the truth?!

smootheP said...

david - The part that saddens me so deeply is that she actually DOES look really cute in the shoes. Which almost makes me think she might look way cuter if they weren't camo...

marc - seriously... i know... kobe...the truth? and camo? i wonder what would happen if kobe was wearing camo, could he speak the truth? or does it matter what he wears?

Snoop ah loop said...

my question is, how does she find the shoes? Does she wear them all the time so as not to lose them?I'm so confused.

Completely Random said...

I'd send the [anonymous 6 year old girl] to boot camp just to show her whats up.

smootheP said...

If she keeps this up, boot camp MAY become an option ...

And for finding the shoes... don't worry. Little girls can never find ANYTHING in their rooms, so it doesn't matter.

Anonymous said...

I promise ... I tried!